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Its christmas! its Christmas! Random thoughts.
The time is 12:15 for me; Christmastime!

This has been a tougher christmas for me. I think before, I was avoiding things, so i'd do what I did for christmas -- help out with the community dinner, etc. Like, a reaction to an imaginary judge saying i'm not doing enough. This year -- no judge. I had to 100% choose my actions.. and, well, if I could have things my way, i'd have a significant other and create family traditions with her. However, i do NOT have a significant other; i'm easily swayed into depression if I stay inactive, so... when i got invited out to someone's house for dinner this evening, I accepted very quickly.

And it was very good.

Tomorrow should be interesting. I'll be showing up somewhat late.. 11:30 or so, to the christmas dinner thing, by then I'm sure all the choice jobs will have been taken. I'll probably end up being dishwasher or something. Well, hey, anything goes. I dedicate my time, they have me till like 5pm or so, then I go home.

I HAVE A GIFT TO OPEN! I'd post a picture, but i'm too tired. Its small, and carefully wrapped, with a bell. I was given the option of opening it immediately, but i decided, i'll wait till christmas day, its more special that way. I think i netted 2 gifts this year! :] Maybe more, if you count the stuff church gave me for being part of Sunday School. I was able to give 2 gifts as well.. just little things from the heart. Choclates, and I wrote a little book of thoughts to a dear friend.

all you folkses who have established home christmas traditions to participate in: Its a priviledge to have those people in your life. *tips hat to you.*

As far as unwrapped gifts go -- there are more than I can count. Just.. people.. having finances available.. finding a good warm hat... Half Life in God mode... cats who cuddle with me and attack the printer as it prints letters.. the corner table i found at goodwill.. I guess, pretty much my whole life is a gift from the universe, if I look at it like that.

I worked on that christmas letter some more -- printing it out, printing out mailing labels, writing something meaningful on each letter before I popped it in the mail. This is the first year i've felt i had something to say without worrying about who heard it... and i realize, this is not a chore. Each person that I sent something to, I WANTED to send them something, to wish them well. It was smooth and easy.

Watched Dave Mathews Band: Concert in the Park DVD 1 again tonight. They are such an awesome band -- they have good energy with each other, they smile, they are in the zone, at least in that concert. That bass player is frickin awesome. The drummer too. The basis of a band, that's what nausicaa1 says.

Earl May has bunnies. I did not know this. They are cute bunnies. Very cute. More pictures that I'm too tired to post. Can't get bunnies -- cats think of them as food. Poor bunnies. My friend Collette (not LJ) has a bunny. Her bunny is cuddly. I want to visit that bunny. And Collette, if she'll stand my company. She gets back in January.

My friend livingdeadpan sounds like he's having a rough time. Send him extra hugs, 'kay?

I cried at an email I got. It was a christmas story.. about the Jensens, and this guy's dad, and some wood, and a rifle. I didn't just cry, I bawled. I needed that.. the release back into "everything's okay". Thanks to Jules Murphy for sending that one to me.

Merry Christmas everybody. May your hearts be filled with "everything is just right."


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I do?

Not that I mind extra hugs.

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