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crap! I forgot to mention!
I got a frickin' BONUS in my paycheck. Of ALL the NERVE. My boss didn't tell me it was coming. I mean, i was doing well, but a frickin' BONUS?


i know what it is. It used to be, i had doubts about my abilities. Now, I have a realistic sense of my abilities. That I get bonuses and good reviews -- does not surprise me. I *know* I'm that good, when I'm consistent. (And I'm average when I'm inconsistent.) Thing is, i'm *not* working to get bonuses and raises. I'm working because I'm happy doing what I'm doing, and they're paying me adequately to spend the time there. Any B/S on their side -- falls right off my shoulders.

Bonus is a deviation from the status quo. As such, it is unwelcome. I get thoughts/doubts of my work ability. However, once given, and the surprise is recovered from, it is gratefully accepted, and sent to the credit card.


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