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Caffeine and No-Caffeine
For better or for worse, I decided that between Thanksgiving and Christmas, I would fall off the no-caffeine wagon.   I'm currently at day.. #4? #5?  of caffeine, and I can feel the cycle setting in.

First off - drank a bunch of Pepsi at a lunch buffet.  My body is.. lets say, that much carbonation in my body.. and all that sugar.. the bacteria in my gut are having a fun time.   But that doesn't have anything to do with caffeine.. though it might.

This morning, I was doing the Sound Engineer thing at Crestwood United Methodist.   
I missed several things.. well, yah, so we had some people swapping out guitars at the last moment.  Nevertheless, I was slower than normal.    At that point, I'd had a mocha from McDonald's (*1), so caffeine was in my system, but i suspect it had not yet overridden my brain receptors that were still bound to Adenosine. 

This inspired a picture within me:

When I'm caffeinated, its like I have this erratic wavy mental place, that's "up", with "spikes".  The spikes feel awesome!  They are.. what i perceive to be "normal" functioning.     Yet the reality is, I'm skating on the thin ice of caffeinated life..  [PF reference] 

When I'm on caffeine, and I've just woken up and I don't yet have anything in my system, its like ALL of me is "low".    My brain can barely poke its head out of the sea of sleep.

When I am decaffeinated & on the wagon.. and have gotten through withdrawal.. my mental pattern is .. not so exciting, doesn't have "spikes", but its definitely functional.  And there isn't that large lake of sleepiness underneath it all. 

The best time of all is when I'm fully off the wagon, and I'm running a late nighter, and I imbibe some caffeine. Everything speeds up, I feel very alert, everything functions well..  its only after a few days that the crap starts to set in.  Which is why its so easy to fall off the wagon.  :) 

I may get back on the wagon here in the next few days. 

*1)  I've been wanting one of these since they first came out - they don't have a decaf version.  Same as those Starbucks Doubleshot drinks.   Its a feeling of "being left out" of a culture that I was once part of..  And I think this tradition of occasionally falling off the wagon to sample things is actually good for my sense of connection with the culture around me.    My verdict:  it sucked, btw.  Sickeningly sweet.. I think I like the decaf mocha at Starbucks a lot more (albeit, its also much more expensive).